Wednesday, February 13, 2013

ready or not.

We move in six days. I'm all kinds of emotions right now. I'm so excited about going home for a few months. I'm excited about being able to go shopping with my mama on her days off. I'm excited about being back at Central. I'm so ready to do best friend things with my best friends. I'm excited Jasper will get to attend Central's per-school. I'm so glad I'll be able to have babysitters whenever I want them & not feel guilty about it. I'm glad we will be surrounded with our families again. I'm excited about being able to spend more time with my sisters.

I'm heartbroken that Matthew doesn't get to share in my excitement. I'm sad he will miss so much over the next year. I feel guilty for being so excited about going home, when it means we will be apart from him. I feel guilty that he has to be away from his children, but I don't.

I'm scared to see how Jasper reacts when he realizes Daddy isn't going to be with us all the time, like he has gotten use to. I'm scared Sara Kate won't know her Daddy like she should.

I'm sad. I'm excited. I'm scared. I'm unsure. I'm determined.

And the most important thing? I'm positive. That's the kind of person I always am. At times I may feel like my world is falling apart, but I don't let it show. Not because I'm trying to hide my feelings, but because I won't let the devil win. If I let myself get beat down & let my emotions get the best of me, I am the one that suffers. My children suffer. My marriage suffers. I refuse to be anything but happy. No matter what, you will see a smile on my face.

We will get through this, just like we have before. My God is faithful & he will see us through.

Monday, February 11, 2013

Chocolate Festival

Know what makes a girl happy? A room full of chocolate! ;) Morehead City had it's annual Chocolate festival this past weekend and we went with some friends. They had chocolate drinks, chocolate covered everything, things stuffed with chocolate, chocolate cakes, & even chocolate popcorn! Of course things where way over priced, but they had samples of everything and we of course had to splurge on a few things to satisfy us me! ;) I tired to talk Matthew & Jesse into doing the pudding eating contest, but they are losers and wouldn't sign up! Sure wish I could have seen that! haha. I'm hoping we will be back next year, in time for the festival! 

Saturday, February 9, 2013

Jasper//Sara Kate--2

Jasper: 3 years & 7 months
Sara Kate: 1 month & 3 weeks

Thursday, February 7, 2013

fun with friends!

A few weeks ago we went to the Aquarium and had such a blast! It was the first time we had gotten out of the house to meet friends and it was much needed! Also? It was the first time I had to be somewhere at a certain time with both kids by myself, and I was only 5 minutes late! :) Yay Mama!!